The Daily Nickel (aka things that suck issue)

1.  Kobe sucks - In this vid he sends the media folk into a tizzy by sarcastically saying he "isnt clutch," implying that "of course I'm clutch, I'm freaking Kobe Bryant".  He's actually not that clutch and comes off sounding a little insecure to me.  But if we're playing the sarcasm game, let me borrow his tone and say Kobe is "definitely not super gay."

2.  The NBA might soon suck - CP3 was seen seated courtside for Heat/Celts with Lebron's boy toy Maverick Carter.  If this is in any way a preview of his next destination, I will be so put off by the Association I might start watching hockey.

3.  Our bullpen sucks - Feels like they are blowing every game right now.  Already 5 blown saves this year.  The Eppley kid doesnt seem overly suckified, but if things dont turn around I might do everybody a favor and sic SEAL team 6 on Oliver and Borbon.  The good news is Feliz should be back soon and we just signed some Cuban to be the CF of the future for $15.5mm.  Hopefully the future starts next week.

4.  Bin Laden sucks - So does Pakistan by the way.  Supposedly he was living in a million dollar compound, but have you seen that thing?  I've seen better houses in Euless, and that's saying something.  Still, gotta give credit where it is due.  In my eyes, Bin Laden has locked up the title of greatest hide-and-go-seek player ever.  Nobody else even try....

5.  Mavs/Lakers G2 hopefully wont suck - I'm calling all Mavs fans to do whatever it is you did on Monday since it worked.  I'll be at my friends house eating his food.  Here is a little preview of what's in store.....TAKE DAT WIT CHEW KOBE!